Revelation

The Bible says that the truth will set one free, but that statement seems clouded. Sometimes the truth hurts, and that hurt can feel like heavy metal chains holding us captive. We often run from the truth because the world’s harsh realities kill our self-protected lives. We ignore the gruesome because we crave innocence and goodness.

We don’t want to believe that hell is real. We don’t want to believe that the military is gassing children to death in Syria. We don’t want to acknowledge that anti-Christs are deceiving people. If we think on these things, our self-protected lives will be shattered.

Tonight, my mentally ill mother pointed to her hand and her forehead and said, “The mark of the beast.” Psychologist and my family convince me that such actions are simply delusions, symptoms of her illness. They refuse to believe her actions have anything to do with the mark of the beast mentioned in Revelation because that is unthinkable. I have had my own psychotic breaks with similar symptoms. My friends, family, and doctors don’t have any answers when I want to talk to them about my end-time symptoms. They prefer defense mechanism. Still I am facing a real harsh truth. My manageable, medicated, mental malfunction is not easily healed when attached to a belief that preaches eternal fire.

Often people refuse to hear me when I speak on this subject because it is too hard for them to hear or comprehend. It sounds too horrifying. I assume most people who claim to follow Christ don’t actually trust the God of the Bible. They meditate on Revelation, but couldn’t imagine that God would actually do the things written there.

God has never offended me in this process. I know the inner workings of my soul, and I know how God fashioned me. There are nights I consider the danger of my past denials while insane, and I fear the horror of losing the faith. However, I trust His sovereign will, no matter what the outcome. What I hate is the incessant need to justify or ignore God. I recently spoke to someone who was convinced he committed the unforgivable sin, blasphemy of the Holy Spirit. Speaking to him was actually refreshing. I still believe there is mercy and forgiveness for him. However, at least he didn’t make excuses or waiver in his convictions. He knew the word of God and didn’t twist it to ease his conscience. 
I am not talking about demeaning God’s mercy. I am simply saying that many preach about God's truth, but truly have no faith in it.