First Love

I don’t really know why I prefer the Jewish race above other races. Intellectually, I know my preference is a form of racism. I even know that scripture warns that racial preference is wicked and not to be practiced. I know New Testament scriptures dismantle circumcision as some sort of mark of superiority. I know about the conflict that arose between Peter and Paul when Peter began to separate himself from those who were uncircumcised. Paul strictly rebuked Peter. Jesus has given us a New Covenant in His blood. The Gentiles are welcomed into the community of God. This is Jesus’s reward. He has purchased men for God, of all races, nations, creeds, and color.

However, something has never settled in my heart. In my mind, God divorced His people. The story of the Jewish people is a tragedy. It is a romance where someone is left with a broken heart. God promised that the Jewish people would be a great nation, if they obeyed His commandments. They didn’t, so God had to send Jesus to fulfill the law. God never received His bride, Israel. She never came to Him. His first love failed to live up to the standards set by the Father, so God refashioned His happy ending. The desire of His heart rejected Him, so He fell in love with someone who would have Him.

In my mind, it feels like the New Covenant is plan B. His first love didn’t want Him, so God turned to those who would receive Him. Love conquers any heart. God can’t be pleased without faith and love, so Christianity replaces Judaism. I continue to have the longing for the restoration of the Jewish people because I know God longs for His first love.

Sometimes I feel like a child in a brutal divorce. Even with all the luxury of salvation, it feels broken and unsettled. That is why I am lovesick when I meet anyone of Jewish decent. I know they have the opportunity to mend the heart of the God. Their fullness, their restoration will be the ultimate love story.

I am willing to admit that my feelings and my conceptions are wrong. I am admitting to having them.

Most Christians prefer to reads Psalms, the Gospels, or an epistle when seeking connection to God. I often read Lamentations. It is a description of a wound in Christ’s heart. The fall of the Israel. We often ask God to heal our wounds. Maybe we should attempt to acquaint ourselves with His sufferings, and attempt to mend that which has broken His heart.