The Super Tamara Idol

No Christian is oblivious to the fact that society has a deeply flawed perception of female beauty. Woman starve themselves to be considered delicate. To express their beauty, women are obligated to disregard modesty. Computer edits and enhancements are now a common practice, thwarting the view of real, natural beauty.

While I live in the midst of these societal beauty structures, I notice a foreign concept: Jesus sees me as beautiful. I may desire to celebrate this truth, but everything within me and outside of me desires to convince me of my physical ugliness.

Whenever I consider the culmination of the age, I assume my resurrected body will be entirely dissimilar to the vessel I now possess. I assume that when God looks at me, He envisions someone taller, thinner, with longer hair, bigger eyes, and without a rounded face.

I assume this super Tamara is the true Tamara. I rationalize that I am currently a fallen form of myself. He had a better vessel intended. It may be true that part of my body is fallen and prone to decay. However, I think the refined version I have imagined is deeply distorted.

It will take a disciplined effort to convince my heart that Jesus considers my frame beautiful. He loves my brown eyes; while I long for blue or green. He likes that I am 5’4, while I imagine a better version of 5’7. I have created a Tamara idol. It is a strange version of me, which is not the true expression of Tamara. God is repulsed by my recreation actually. He really does love who He created and finds me beautiful.

A scripture event continues to enter my mind when I consider this flawed perceptions of myself. The encounter when Peter rebukes Jesus. He tells Jesus that He shall never die on a cross. Jesus says, "Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men." (Matthew 16:23)

Jesus recognizes this distortion of His true character and will not fail to rebuke it. He is a suffering servant. It is His nature and one of His greatest attributes. I must too fight Satan who wants to distort my beauty.